Acceptance

Hola. Hope you are well.

Earlier this year I went to a football network event and met a number of sports journalists and the general theme of their feedback was that to achieve success I needed to work harder. Whatever I was doing I needed to do more of it, so if I write about football, I needed to write more, if I watch games, I needed to watch more games, if I read about football I needed to read more, you get the drift.

A couple of weeks ago I watched ITV2’s ‘Big Reunion: On Tour’. ‘Her With One Permanent Job’ must have been elsewhere or this programme would not have seen the light of day in our flat.

On the programme J from 5ive spoke about why he hadn’t taken part in the reunion (5ive are currently 4our), and his breakdown during his time in the group.

He went on to explain how he thought being in a group would make him happy, that fame would make him happy, that going out with good looking women would make him happy. Apparently none of it did. It was only when he started meditating and looking inward that he became happier. I fully believe constantly chasing external things in the hope they will make you happy is a sure-fire way to driving you insane.

Since seeing J’s revelation, I have changed my life, or at least my approach to life. My new approach is to accept that since I currently work 5 days a week and without the way with all to create time or clone myself, I’m not going to be able to do all the creative things I want to. Or if they do get done it’s going to take me longer.

Prior to this, somewhat in line with those at the football seminar, I would try to do as many things as I could but because life has a way of getting in your way, it would often mean I wouldn’t get everything done, in the time frame I’d put on myself. This would often leave me feeling frustrated.

Now, post J, I can concentrate on the things I’ve done and not beat myself up for the things I haven’t done. After all what I do isn’t that important, I write blogs, I tweet celebs. If my new approach means that a celebrity has to wait a couple more days before they can ignore my tweet then so be it and for that they have J from 5ive to thank.

Til next time, stay safe!

@anunknowncomic

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The economic recovery

Hola. Hope you are well.

I was reading a football article about Newcastle FC and within the article it mentioned that in Newcastle there’s joblessness of 10.5%, youth unemployment close to 25%; 30% of Newcastle children in poverty – and 22,000 people last year seeking advice to cope with debt.

Over the summer one of the big topics was zero hour contracts and how as many as 5.5m employees may be on these contracts. At their worse these contracts tie the employers to a company whilst offering no guarantee of work.

Then there’s the fact that the number of people reliant on food banks has risen by as much as 21%.

Throw in the fact that families living in B&B’s is at its highest for 10yrs, due to the number of families who have lost their homes

Or that Wonga a business that succeeds on the back of people’s financial troubles saw their profits increase by 35% to £84.5m.

So with all this, when I hear people talk about the economic recovery, I don’t buy it but then again I can’t afford to.

Til next time, stay safe!

@anunknowncomic

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How many fish in a think tank?

Hola. Hope you are well.

As some of you may know, as well as being an unknown comedian, I also work in a school as a teaching assistant.

The child I work with has just started their GCSEs. GCSEs however have just been restructured, with pupils now taking exams at the end of the course, as opposed to the modular system which has been in place in recent years.

Under the modular system pupils would cover a certain part of the syllabus and then be tested on it, so would be continually assessed during their 2 years of GCSEs.

There are arguments for and against both systems but it does make me wonder how soon a political think tank will say this current exam based system is unfair and puts too much pressure on pupils to perform for a one-off exam and call for a system that more truly reflects a student’s ability over the 2 years.

Answers on a postcard! (please show your workings)

Til next time stay, safe!

@anunknowncomic

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How not to make friends

Hola. Hope you are well.

I’m gearing up, to go back to work tomorrow (school). You know how it is, you have six weeks off and then you’ve got to go back to work. How not to make friends.

I’m not going to dwell on what’s happening in Syria, but not only did the vote in the House of Commons go against him, David Cameron also had to cut short his 4th holiday of the year.

So with this in mind, when have you had to cut your holiday short and why? Hopefully nothing too serious. You can let me know via the comments button.

I’ve never had to quit a holiday early but I did once arrange to come back from one so I could do a gig. Naturally the gig got cancelled.

Til next time, stay safe!

@anunknowncomic

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