Home the heroes?

Hola. Hope you are well.

I struggle a bit with factual books but occasionally I dip into one. The other week I read some of Hope and Glory by Stuart Maconie.

There’s a section in the book where he writes about the Battle of the Somme, where more than 19 000 British Soldiers died on the first day alone. One soldier who survived the Somme was William Towers, but in so doing, lost a leg. On his return to England, he recalls how a man in the street looked him up and down and said, “I suppose you’ll be living off other people’s generosity for the rest of your life”.

A few pages later, Maconie references how immediately after the end of the First World War, the ‘wounded and damaged men’ were having trouble surviving financially and without jobs and with no welfare system, many ex soldiers were forced to beg on the street.

In 2013, it was revealed that 9000 ex soldiers were homeless (they also made up 10% of the prison population). In 2014 Evgeny Lebedev, owner of The Independent and London Evening Standard, set up a charity Homeless Veterans to help those ex serviceman that have fallen on hard times.

Whatever you think of war and military intervention, (it should be the very last option) does it not seem odd that we are relying on charity to help people who have fought in the name of this country? You might think the government would have some provisions in place to help them.

Apparently not because in Nov 2014 David Cameron, gave his backing to the charity. Unless I’m mistaken he’s the Prime Minister, is he not in a position to do more than merely backing a charity. After all some of these ex service people will have gone into conflict on his say so.

Til next time, be nice to each other.

@anunknowncomic

If you have time, have a listen to my comedy podcast. Cheers

Do you work in the same industry as your partner?

Hola. Hope you are well.

On the last blog post I spoke about how I went to see Isy Suttie. Also at the gig and trying out some new material was Isy’s boyfriend, who is also a comedian.

I’m not sure I’d like it if ‘Her With One Part-time job’ was also a comedian because even if we didn’t set out to compare careers, it would be inevitable.

With ‘HWOPJ’ being more focussed than me when it comes to career/job stuff, I’m sure if she were a comedian she’d be writing a BBC sitcom, whilst I’d be doing… I’d be doing this.

Feel free to let me know if you work (have worked) in the same industry as your partner and how that is working out. You can contact me via the comments button or on Twitter @anunknowncomic

Cheers

Til next time, stay safe!

@anunknowncomic

Prongcasts

A reflection on London living

Hola. Hope you are well.

I’m not saying our flat is small but Her With One Part-time Job recently received as a birthday present a stand up mirror. As there was no obvious place to put it, talk (not by me) turned to re-arranging the whole bedroom. Call me old-fashioned but surely one slimline piece of furniture shouldn’t cause so much disruption.

Til next time, stay safe!

@anunknowncomic

Prongcasts

What does the ‘P’ stand for?

Hola. Hope you are well.

I have a dilemma, not a proper dilemma but a dilemma all the same. ‘Her With One Permanent Job’ is no more. Don’t worry I’ve not traded her in for a younger model, that’s happens when the fame comes. Naturally I’m only joking.

Originally ‘Her With One Permanent Job’ was known as ‘Her With Four Jobs’, that’s when she had 4 jobs, then she got a permanent job, hence her being known as ‘Her With One Permanent Job’ (HWOPJ) for the last couple of years.

Her status at work has recently changed as she has returned to the world of academia, so has gone part-time at work. This is where I have the problem, because the world now knows her as ‘HWOPJ’ and I’m loathe to change this acronym. I’m now thinking the ‘P’ should remain and stand for part-time.

I maybe over thinking things, but my success has been built on taking care of the fine details.

Feel free to let me know your thoughts, should I stick with HWOPJ, or go with something new? You can contact me via the comments button.

Til next time, stay safe!

@anunknowncomic

Prongcasts

Good bank Bad bank

Hola. Hope you are well.

On my last blog post I mentioned the walking trip me and my friends had been on. Well that was in the day, in the evening of the same day I went to a the wedding reception of one of ‘Her With One Permanent Job’. I know, I do have a lot of energy for a man in his mid to late thirties. Fuelled by this energy and maybe some drinks, I even managed to bust some shapes on the dance floor. All a bit of fun I thought. That was until at the end of the night, one of ‘HWOPJ’s relatives (one the fam they don’t see much) said to her, “How have you ended up with an African with no rhythm?” Maybe it’s my sensibilities but what I most object from that statement is that I’m not a good dancer. I’ve won a dancing competition, don’t you know?

Talking of weddings I mentioned in passing to ‘HWOPJ’ that Jeremy Forrest wants to marry the school girl he abducted and ran off to France with once he gets out of prison. Her response was, “Even they’re getting married”. So in this whole story, it turns out I’m the bad guy. Typical!

In financial news, there are plans to split RBS into a good bank and a bad bank. I know which one I’d be more likely to put my money into.

And Finally… the new fad diet is the 5:2 diet. It’s when in a week, you eat normally for 5 days and then have 2 days when you starve yourself (I am paraphrasing). This did make me think, could this be adapted to other parts of our lives and then I thought work. So from now on I’m going to work 5 days and then have 2 days off. I wonder if it will catch on.

Til next time, stay safe!

@anunknowncomic

Prongcasts

Why I’m confused by breasts

Hola. Hope you are well.

I’ve been thinking about breasts these last few days. When I say breasts, I mean women’s breasts.

I started thinking of breasts on Sunday, when I saw a tweet from a The Sun newspaper saying Bruce Grobbelaar’s daughter was stripping, via a webcam for a £3 per min site.  For those who don’t know, Bruce Grobbelaar was a former Liverpool goalkeeper.

Purely for research purposes I clicked on the link, and there was the story. The paper described her as a ‘seedy webcam model’. This did strike me as a somewhat hypocritical as The Sun is one of two newspapers that continue to have Page 3 models. The other being the Daily Star, but that doesn’t count as it’s not a proper newspaper.

Then on Sunday, ‘Her With One Permanent Job’ and I watched Graham Norton, where the music was provided by Robin Thicke. His song Blurred Lines is currently at No 1 in the charts, partly because it’s a catchy tune, but also on the back of its video, which has received a lot of hype mainly because it features a conveyor belt of attractive, young women, topless.

Purely for research, I checked out the video on the internet, this time being monitored by ‘HWOPJ’ who was in control of the mouse. Once she felt we had seen enough, she turned it off. We saw enough to realise it was essentially Robin Thicke and a conveyor belt of attractive, young women, topless.

This video has had gazillions of hits in no time and appears to be seen as some kind of genius marketing plan. I would argue that if you put out a video featuring attractive young women, semi naked, people will click on it. That and cats doing funny things. If you put out a video of an attractive young semi naked woman, with a cat doing something funny, I think it would break the internet.

So all this has left me a little confused. If I have this correct, women baring breasts in a million pound pop music video is acceptable but a woman doing it on a webcam is not. Especially if it is the daughter of a former professional footballer.

Ps. Feel free to let me know if  your partner determines how long is acceptable for you to view breasts?

Til next time, stay safe!

@anunknowncomic

Prongcasts

A hotbed of literature

Hola. Hope you are well.

On my last blog post, I mentioned how whilst travelling back to Manchester on Megabus I was reading Chris Evans’ autobiography, ‘It’s not what you think’. On the same journey ‘Her With One Permanent Job’ was reading, ‘the Second Sex’ by Simone de Beauvoir a 800 page beast of feminism. It’s safe to say they’re quite different books, so with this in mind, what are you reading and what is your partner reading? Feel free to let me know via the comments button.  Who knew that Megabus was such a hotbed of literature.

Four minutes after getting off the aforementioned Megabus in Manchester, I bumped into someone I knew. This wouldn’t have happened in London, where sometimes the people you’ve agreed to meet up with don’t turn up, nevermind bumping into them.

A few blog posts ago, I posed the question, do you have a plug socket under a sink? Whilst in Manchester, where I was staying with my mum, I discovered she not only has no plug socket under her kitchen sink, she currently has no kitchen sink. Feel free to let me know if you don’t have a kitchen sink.

On Saturday evening, we invited Prong 2 and 2 of his housemates to our flat, for what can be described as a dinner party. I must confess that this may not have been my idea nor can I take the praise for the food that was served, although I was in charge of the music. I feel I took enough of a back seat that I can say the evening was a success, apart from one thing. As we only have 4 chairs and there was 5 of us present, we had to improvise, chair wise. This meant (one person) me having to sit on a mini step-ladder, which was not a suitable substitute. So with this in mind, what have used instead of a chair?

And Finally… For those interested I’m currently reading, ‘The Collector’ by John Fowles. (I’m only halfway through so don’t tell me how it ends! Cheers)

Til next time, stay safe!

@anunknowncomic

Prongcasts