Never Forget

I’ve heard it said Theresa May’s political career will be defined by Brexit. I sincerely hope not as I wouldn’t want people to forget the Hostile Environment she created at the home office resulting in the ‘Go Home Vans’ and the Windrush cruelty. I wouldn’t want people to forget how she significantly cut police numbers as Home Secretary. I wouldn’t want people to forget her awful 2017 election campaign where not only did she repeat her mantra, ‘Strong & Stable’ to the point of ridicule but had to do the unheard thing of abandoning her manifesto policy (‘dementia tax’) part way through the campaign. And I certainly wouldn’t want people to forget how she treated the Grenfell survivors.

@anunknowncomic

Check out my comedy prongcast. Cheers

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Tales from the bin area.

A bit over a month ago I found Keith Richard’s autobiography in the communal bin area (it wasn’t in the bin it was in a plastic bag of other books & DVDs on the ground). I took the book because I’d previously wanted to read it. Then a couple of weeks ago I found a working watch in the recycling bin. It was poking out from a box of letters. I had been thinking about treating myself to a new watch as mine had been playing up for a while. One of the good things about this watch is that it glows in the dark so when I can’t sleep at night I know exactly what time it is. Who knew that the most successful aspect of my life would centre around the communal bin area?

@anunknowncomic

If you like your comedy unedited, unscripted & about 32 mins listen to my comedy prongcast. Cheers

Swings & roundabouts.

On Saturday mornings I help primary school children with their reading (officially I’m a Literacy Intervention Tutor). The venue I’ve been working at since September has ended so in the last few weeks I’ve moved to a new location meaning I’m dealing with new children and a new co-ordinator. On the plus side the new location is within walking distance. The previous location meant getting a train there and a train back which ate into my very small wage. The downside of this new venue however is that I have to walk along a 6 lane carriageway, so although I’m up financially I’m down in the lungs.

@anunknowncomic

If you like your comedy unscripted, unedited & 32mins check out my comedy prongcast. Cheers

Are libraries on borrowed time?

Hola. Hope you are well.

If libraries did not already exist, they would not be introduced today but as they do exist they are being killed slowly.

The reason I fear for the future of libraries is twofold.

Firstly, local councils are being crippled by the government imposed cuts and so are continually looking at ways they can cut costs. Secondly, the people entrusted to make these decisions, generally don’t use services like libraries or community centres, so don’t appreciate their worth. This is why such services are seen as easy targets. Here are the figures of library closures.

So what of the future? I’ve heard it said libraries need to modernise, which seems to mean sell coffee and replace qualified librarians with well-meaning volunteers. Then in the near future, MPs and academics will no doubt scratch their head, furrow their brow and ponder why children from poorer backgrounds have problems with literacy levels. They will of course lay the blame on teachers and parents, whilst ignoring the impact of the library closures.

To me libraries are more than books (free), computer hire (free), newspapers (free), magazines (free), CD&DVDs (nominal fee), they are a communal space you can go to seek sanctuary.

Til next time, be nice to each other.

@anunknowncomic

Should you have any spare time, check out my comedy prongcasts. Cheers

Should we be bombing Belgium?

Hola. Hope all is well.

Apparently, bombing Syria will make us safer. Wasn’t that what the ‘War on Terror’ was meant to do? Anyone know how that is going?

Syria is already being bombed by USA, Russia, France (and others) so unless we have special peace emitting bombs, I’m not sure what the UK can add.

All this talk of bombing Syria, comes as a response to the killings in Paris  but weren’t those attackers from France and Belgium, so should we not be bombing Belgium?

Let’s for argument’s sake say our bombs wipe out every member of ISIS, what next? Who or what will take their place? Will it be a peace-loving group or another terrorist group? If for example, you kill Jihadi John, who takes his place Radicalised Ringo?

If you want to stop ISIS, perhaps a starting point might be to stop people funding them. Do we know who funds ISIS and do we have any dealings with them?

Alternatively, David Cameron can bomb Syria, destabilise the region further and then refuse to take in refugees when they flee to Europe. Politics after all is about decisions.

Til next time, be nice to each other.

@anunknowncomic

Should you have any spare time, listen to my comedy #prongcasts Cheers!

 

Is the traditional affair over?

Hola. Hope you are well.

What has happened to the traditional affair? One that happens organically, maybe with a colleague at work, or a chance encounter with a stranger in a bar.

Not one conducted via a website like Ashley Madison; where as long as you have an email address and a credit card you can order an affair. Plus, the old way, meant that if your partner did find out you could always say, you didn’t mean it to happen. This may be harder to believe when you’ve signed up to a site that specialises in affairs.

Having said that, these days people date online, so why shouldn’t they conduct their affairs this way? In these more technological times it’s conceivable that the whole arc of your relationship could be played out online. You could for example, meet your partner online, meet your affairee (not sure that’s a word) online, sort your divorce online, sell the marital home online, arrange access to the kids online etc… etc…

The author of this blog is the co-author of How To Dump Your Girlfriend

Ps. Marriage is a serious business and shouldn’t be undertaken lightly.

@anunknowncomic

Should you have any spare time, check out my comedy Prongcasts

 

Why Tony Blair makes me feel like a teenager

Hola. Hope you are well.

People said we’d have a hung parliament. (spoiler alert) We don’t.

People said Jeremy Corbyn was only in the  Labour leadership race to widen the debate, he’s currently leading that race.

Now people are saying he’s unelectable.

Who knows if Jeremy Corbyn can or can’t connect with the electorate? What we do know, is that Andy Burnham, Yvette Cooper and Liz Kendall are struggling to connect with supporters of their own party.

It’s probably telling that whilst Corbyn has sparked excitement amongst young people, the ‘Anyone But Corbyn’ campaign is being led by politicians from the New Labour era.

Leading to odd situations, like Tony Blair predicting a Corbyn led Labour will split the party. That’s Tony Blair the most divisive figure in the party. Or Gordon Brown explaining what it takes for Labour to be electable. It’s just a shame he’s never had a chance to put these ideas into practice.

It’s not just Tony Blair and Gordon Brown, it seems like every day someone  from that era is telling Labour supporters not to vote for Jeremy Corbyn. They don’t seem as forthcoming when it comes to saying why we should vote for the other contenders.

I can’t help thinking that this approach, like a parent forbidding a teenager from doing something, is just making Corbyn appear that little bit more desirable.

Til next time, be nice to each other.

@anunknowncomic

Should you have any spare time, have a listen to my comedy prongcasts. Cheers