A tale of one city

Hola. Hope you are well.

I read recently that London has more billionaires than any other city.

I also read that in some parts of London studs/spikes have been erected to prevent homeless people from sleeping in these places. In the same article it said over 6400 people slept rough in London last year. How can these two things occur in the same city?

Also in London, our Mayor, Boris, announced that he’s bought 3 water cannons. Is he expecting trouble?

Surely the money would have been better used to find out why people would want to riot and address those issues. Or perhaps, instead of investing in water cannons the Mayor could have invested in some of the services that were removed in the name of austerity.

Maybe I’m wrong and the  water cannons weren’t bought as a means to controlling angry mobs but will be used to blast the homeless out of London. I really shouldn’t give people ideas.

Til next time, stay safe!

@anunknowncomic

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Im not a property developer

Hola. Hope you are well.

If you live in London there is always some talk about housing and house prices. This was added to recently after Mark Carney the Governor of the Bank of England spoke of his concerns about continuing price rises.

I’m not a property developer, I don’t have a property portfolio, I don’t even own the property I live in, so what I’m about to say might be without foundation (deliberate pun).

From what I can see property prices/renting is so expensive, especially in London is because there’s a lot more people requiring housing than there are available houses, so my first solution would be to build more houses.

The reason the problem is more apparent in London is because a lot of people gravitate to the capital for work. This obviously creates a demand for housing, pushing prices up. This then affects those that aren’t on a big wage, meaning they struggle to live. With this in mind, my second solution would be to encourage investment/industry in other parts of the country so people wouldn’t have to move to london for work. It would also stimulate the economies in areas of the country that need it and more equally distribute the country’s wealth.

As I said at the outset, I’m not an expert on these matters so feel free to agree or disagree. You can contact me via the comments button or on twitter @anunknowncomic

Til next week, stay safe!

Prongcasts

A reflection on London living

Hola. Hope you are well.

I’m not saying our flat is small but Her With One Part-time Job recently received as a birthday present a stand up mirror. As there was no obvious place to put it, talk (not by me) turned to re-arranging the whole bedroom. Call me old-fashioned but surely one slimline piece of furniture shouldn’t cause so much disruption.

Til next time, stay safe!

@anunknowncomic

Prongcasts

Living the dream

geordie girls

Hola. Hope you are all well.

I’m still in London, I’ve managed to do a full week without leaving. Although I do have a cold. I mention this not for sympathy, or to be mocked about man flu etc.. I just mention it cos it’s true.

The big story of the week appears to be the weather. Every time we have heavy snowfall in this country the news coverage is always the same. People are interviewed about how they couldn’t get to work, a car will be seen sliding in the background, there will be a report from salt mines as some councils fear a shortfall of grit and salt. We then get told how much absenteeism from work will cost the economy and then there will be pictures of Geordie women on a night out with very little on. Whilst we are on this subject, my advice to any young women, Geordie or not, on a night out in this cold weather is PUT A COAT ON! Guys will still fancy you if you are covered up. Trust me, the onset of pneumonia isn’t a sexy look.

The snow seemed to affect all forms of transport here in London, including the Tube. I’m not 100% sure why as the majority of the underground system is underground as the name underground would suggest. London maybe an odd place but it doesn’t snow underground, although I wouldn’t rule out Mayor Boris introducing it in the near future.

Despite the snow, I did manage to travel 1 and a half hours to play football on Fri between 1pm-2pm. I mention the time, as it takes a certain type of person to be available to play football on a Friday early afternoon. As it happens that type of person seems to be a creative type, as all the players were actors and me. So if you ever see grown men playing football at unusual hours of the day, take pity on them they are just living the dream.

The other big news of the week was the fact that England didn’t win the bid to host the 2018 football World Cup. People have asked where did the bid go wrong? I would suggest it was when we started telling everyone and anyone that would listen that the organisation that were making the decision, were corrupt. That’s what I think anyway.

And Finally… Onto another institution that may or may not be fixed and that is The X Factor. I watched a repeat of Saturday’s show and it mentioned how Zain from One Direction lost his Grandfather earlier in the week. I wouldn’t make light of his situation but it did make me think how when you go on that show, something bad tends to happen. It’s as if the contestants have made a pact with the devil for a bit of fame. This series alone, Cher, Zain and Paige have lost family members and Katie found out her 81 year old Grandma was a prostitute. It does make me wonder of it’s all worth it. Is it really better than playing football in the snow on a Friday afternoon?

Til next time, stay safe!