I was running late for my backup train this morning so I had to skip breakfast which I never do. I caught the train but was then called back to take the boy to the doctor. Although not ideal it did mean I could go home and have some porridge.
If you like your comedy unscripted, unedited & 32 mins check out my prongcast. Cheers
I’m always trying to find ways of best utilising my time mainly because I don’t have much of it. That’s why this Monday I tried to record a prongcast (a podcast I do with my mate Prong2) during my boy’s nap time.
There was always a risk this wouldn’t work as his nap times do vary but I thought it was a risk worth taking.
Naturally things did not go to plan as the boy didn’t take his nap til about 10 mins after Prong2 had gone home. I doubt I’ll be doing anything like this any time soon although knowing me I wouldn’t fully rule it out.
New parents are not giving their newborns the names Nigel & Keith. It begs the question, if you could save one of these names which one would it be? Let me know via the comments button or @anunknowncomic
It’s also made me wonder if Keith Farage would have helped secure Brexit or would Nigel Chegwin have presented The Naked Jungle in the buff? We may never know.
Have a listen to my comedy prongcast.
When I was younger I was told that repeatedly switching the light bulb on and off would blow the bulb. Is there any truth in this or were my parents stopping me from being a nuisance? Let me know via the comments button or @anunknowncomic
Listen to my comedy prongcast. Thanks
My one year boy has just started taking his first tentative steps. He is however good at kicking a ball whilst holding my hand. With this in mind I was wondering what’s the earliest age Premier League clubs offer parents a ‘financial inducement’ to join their academy. The sooner the better from my perspective.
If not a Premier League footballer, I’m thinking a forensics officer as he has an inbuilt ability to find the smallest of bits. There would be some danger that the evidence would end up in his mouth but I suppose that’s the risk of employing toddlers.
Have a listen to my comedy prongcast. Thanks.
I managed to work out (I read the instructions) how to turn off the flashing lights and transmission noise on the baby monitor.
It was quite reassuring having the noise, just so we knew it was working but at night it impacted on my sleep. Now I can have uninterrupted sleep, unless the baby wakes, I need the toilet, or as is happening I wake anyway as my sleep pattern is all over the place.
Talking of baby monitors, you can set the volume at 1. Who sets their baby monitor at 1? Surely it’s either set high or in the middle, not one higher than mute. Should you set it at 1 feel free to contact me via the comments button or @anunknowncomic
Listen to my comedy prongcast. Thanks.
The week before the events in the previous blog post, this happened.
The baby was coughing in his sleep so I woke him to give him some medicine. Did he a) go straight back to sleep or b) was he still awake more than an hour later? Answers on a postcard to it’s always answer b with these kind of questions.
Should you have any spare time, check out my comedy podcasts. Cheers.
The baby’s sleep has not been at its best in the last few weeks. Initially we thought it was because he had a cold but the poor sleep seems to have continued long after the cold disappeared.
On the back of this the other half ordered a blackout blind from a well known pharmaceutical outfit (Boots). The blind was supposed to be ready for collection on Saturday. After being out all day, I had to run to said shop before it closed at 5:30, only to find the blind had not been delivered. I was however, assured it would be there on Monday.
On Monday the other half went to pick it up and it still wasn’t there. No one seemed to know where it was. In many ways it was the blind leading the blind.
Ps. We now have the blind, yet the sleep has yet to improve.
Should you have time check out my comedy prongcasts. Cheers.
I’m not one to talk about my bedroom activities, that is until now.
Since the arrival of a baby in our flat, sleep has been the number one topic trending.
Early on me and the other half decided we would split night-time duties, thinking it best we both get some sleep, rather than both of us being permanently knackered.
In practical terms, this has meant sleeping in separate rooms and handing the baby over in the middle of the night. Initially the baby swap included me taking the cot from one bedroom to the other (not with the baby in it). The system may have seemed a little cumbersome but it worked for us.
Our system came under further scrutiny at Christmas, when we went back to our parents. Fortunately they both live on the same street. This still meant that instead of carrying the baby from one room to the other, I had to transport the baby from one house to the next, with the street doubling for the corridor.
This meant that from any point between 2am -3:30am a neighbour struggling for sleep would have seen me wheeling a baby up the street, every night for a week.
These days the baby is sleeping a lot better, sleeping through to 5am most nights. A wake up call a little earlier than I would ideally like but it’s better than the disrupted nights sleep we were previously experiencing. Due to these early starts we’ve decided that we will take it in turns to sleep in the same room as the baby.
One day in the future me and the other half may even share the same bed. Having said that and whisper it, I reckon I sleep better on my own.
Should you have any time listen to my comedy prongcasts. Thanks
My 8 month old ‘organised’ a lunch for his mum on Mother’s Day, but who should’ve paid for this, me (dad) or him?
Before you say me, consider these points:
i) The baby’s mum is not my mum.
ii) Financially he has done very well from existing.
iii) I’d already bought his present (flowers) for his mum.
iv) I have to get my mum a present, so paying for lunch would double my outlay.
Of course we could have got the mum to go halves with either me or the boy (or thirds with the both of us) but this may have gone against the spirit of Mother’s Day.
Who knew parenting would pose so many questions?
Should you have any spare time, check out my comedy prongcasts. Just Press Play. Cheers.