Before Sunset, Before Sunrise

ian wright,kate walsh,melinda messenger

Hola. Hope you are all well.

I’ve got a busy week ahead, well busy for me. I’ve got a couple of writing workshops to do and then I’m off to Edinburgh on Thurs for four shows see here. If you’re in Edinburgh or know someone who is in on these days, come along or get them to come along. I’ll be travelling back next Mon, so I will update this blog next Tues. It will also mean I won’t be on the radio this Sat morning. Let’s hope the person they get to replace me isn’t someone who wants to take my place, unlike the last time I was away from the show.

A couple of months ago, I mentioned how I did a few poems at the Manchester Independent Book Market. Well Literature Northwest were there with a camera and have put 3 of my poems on YouTube. You can see my attempt at a Peace poem here and there are 2 more poems here. Cheers.

Last week I mentioned how a couple of Warrington Rugby League fans ruffled my hair. It got me thinking that this had a lot to do with being part of a group (and a little to do with alcohol) , because they wouldn’t have done this if they were on their own. Nobody would do that to a complete stranger if they were on their own. This made me think how many people does it take, in a group before you would feel confident enough to ruffle the hair of a stranger. So the next time you’re out in a big group and you feel confident enough to ruffle a complete stranger’s hair ,do it and then count how many people you are out with and then let me know. If you have an problems when doing this, tell the people involved you are conducting an experiment. I’m sure this will smooth things over.

Talking of last week’s post, just out of interest did anyone click on the pics of Tom Jones’ groin area???

Onto other matters, I’ve had to endure what can only be described as two chick flicks. The first one was ‘Before Sunrise’, where a man and a woman meet on a train, they end up chatting on the train, then they chat whilst walking through Vienna, they chat in a bar, they chat whilst they’re lying in the park. There’s a lot of chatting. We don’t even get to see them boff. Apparently this is romantic. And just when you thought it was safe to go near the DVD player, they made a sequel, ‘Before  Sunset’. This was totally different, when I say totally different, it involved all the chatting of its predecessor but this film was set in Paris. If there are any men reading this and their wives/girlf shows any interest in watching these films, fake an illness, distract her with sex or do whatever you have to do, to get out of watching them. If you’ve watched either of these films let me know your thoughts. I imagine they will differ on gender lines, but I could be wrong.

I was interested to see that Ian Wright has left ‘Live from Studio Five’, which means there is a slot for a black guy to talk nonsense about nonsense. Never has there been a job  description that says me, in the history of job descriptions.

And finally…. In my attempt to be more popular than an octopus I have predicted the League placings for the upcoming Premiership. So if you want to know where your team is going to finish or you’re just interested then click here (and scroll down to bottom).

                                                 Til next week (tues), stay safe!
(original post 16/8/10)

The Natural Order

Goodluck Jonathan

Hola. Hope you are all well.

I had a busy week. I was doing some poetry workshops in a couple of schools, including on in Clitheroe, which meant I had to get up at 5:50am. That’s 5:50 in the MORNING. Writers aren’t built for such things, do you think proper writers like Katie Price gets up at this time?

In fact last week I was up before ‘Her with one permanent job’ four times. Things like this shouldn’t happen. For starters I don’t overly embrace change and secondly I worry when the natural order of things are messed around. Something as simple as me getting up before ‘HWOPJ’ could lead to the World imploding, you never know. Those who share my concerns, needn’t worry any further as the natural order of things has been restored as of this morning, when ‘HWOPJ’ left for work at 8am. Woohoo! In your face imploding Universe!!!

It was something of a grown up week for me as I even listened to a programme on Radio 4. I’m not really a Radio 4 kinda guy but a fellow poet Kate Fox was on the show so I thought I’d listen. Occasionally I like to hear/see what my peers are up to, only occasionally, mainly I’m more interested in what I’m doing. It was a nice programme, quite informative but I doubt I’ll become a Radio 4 regular. I see Radio 4 rightly or wrongly as for adults, (I know technically I’m an adult), I feel the same way about broadsheet newspapers and drinking coffee. Is there anything you view as adult, despite you being an adult? Feel free to let us know via the comments button.

In other news, I was interested to read that the Nigerian President, Goodluck Jonathan is going to ban his national football team from playing for 2yrs due to their poor showing at the World Cup. (It’s been announced he’s gone back on this situation) What really stuck out about this story was that the President is called Goodluck Jonathan. What a great name that is. Inspired by his name I’m thinking of calling myself All the Best Julian. Having said this it wasn’t that long ago that I was toying with the idea of calling myself inspired by of the Black Eyed Peas. Or before that, when I moved to Didsbury calling myself P Didsbury inspired by P Diddy. Sometimes even I think I have too much time on my hands.

And Finally… As we were talking about football, what with the Nigerian team, may I direct you to my latest football post on my football blog, which considers England’s exit from the World Cup. I genuinely think it’s a good piece of writing, so feel free to check it out. Having said that I genuinely think All the Best Julian would be a good name for me.

                                                           Til Next week, Stay Safe!

                                                               All the Best Julian

(original post 5/7/10)

The Election Section

10 downing st

Hola, Hope you are all well.

I have to admit that I’ve been gripped by all the election coverage. Starting with the fact that some people were unable to vote as they weren’t going to be able to mark their cards before the 10pm cut off point. Did this happen to anyone reading this? At some polling stations some people couldn’t vote because there wasn’t enough ballot papers. I’m no expert on these matters but shouldn’t they work out how many people are eligible to vote at that polling station and allocate one slip per person? Let’s face it, if this chaos had occurred in some far-flung country, we would have raised our eyes and tutted, in a slightly condescending manner.

Something else I couldn’t understand is why some results were known within an hour, the ones in Sunderland for example, yet when I woke the next morning some results still hadn’t come in. Were some councils using pre-school children to count the votes, in some kind of flawed cost cutting move?
The best story to come out of the election was the fact a 14-year-old boy got to vote,despite turning up in his school uniform. (see here). The only reason he was caught out was because a teacher at his school heard him boasting to his friends. I’d like to think all 14yr old school children are all really politically minded and it’s only the media that pretend they’re all into gaming and getting high on plant fertiliser, when in fact playground discussions centre around electoral reform and quantitive easing.

In other news that isn’t the election, I was hosting the launch of the Writing on the Wall Festival, in Liverpool on Sat night. Little did I know the trains between the two cities were so poor. The last train back was 11:38pm, can you believe it? It’s almost as if they don’t want the two cities to interact. My last duty of the night was to introduce the band, they were set up and ready to go at 11:20, I went on, chatted a bit and got off stage at 11:25, grabbed my coat and bag, which was weighed down by the books I didn’t sell at the gig (all of them), say my goodbyes and hot foot it to the station. It was like some kind of low budget action film. You’ll be pleased to know I made the train with 5mins to spare, albeit a little sweaty and confronted with a jam-packed train. You see this world of showbiz that I live isn’t all glamour glamour glamour.

And Finally… I was reading how England and Aston Villa forward Emile Heskey can improve a man’s bedroom prowess. To find out more, check my football blog, (scroll down to the last paragraph).

                                                  Til next week, stay safe!
(original post 10/5/10)